


dancing in the dark

by alexanderlightweight



Series: Words of October 2019 [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Dancing, Domestic, Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Flufftober, Flufftober 2019, Immortal Alec Lightwood, Immortal Husbands, Immortality, It's SOFT angst, M/M, Mentions of Anxiety, Reminiscing, SOMETIMES in order to have fluff you need some angst, Snow, Soft Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-01
Packaged: 2020-11-09 09:42:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20851367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexanderlightweight/pseuds/alexanderlightweight
Summary: Being unmarred by time doesn't mean you don't change with it.Flufftober Day/Prompt 1 - Dancing





	dancing in the dark

**Author's Note:**

> I've overcommitted this October and I am okay with that (for now).

The air was bitingly cold, sharp and fresh and the sky so clear that even here, in the middle of the night they needed no light other than the stars and moon. 

The valley stretched for what seemed like forever and ever until it reaches the distant edge of the forest. Their own private and protected world and Alec hummed to himself as his fingers intertwined with Magnus’. Magic coating and protecting their skin so that they could hold hands without fear of the cold.

“It’s beautiful,” he said softly. It felt as though it would be almost sacrilegious, to speak too loudly and break the peaceful and ethereal mood around them. The moonlight cast a glow to the snow covered ground and it reminded him of Magnus’ magic. 

Calm and blue and endless.

“It is,” Magnus replied and something in his voice made Alec look towards him, catching glowing amber eyes watching him adoringly. He stepped forward, pressing close and Magnus’ free hand reached up to pet and tangle with the tufts of hair sticking out from his hat. “This place is near timeless, Alexander. As are you now. The years will touch you both but because of magic, it will never show on the outside.” 

Magnus retreated, just for a moment and Alec felt himself ache in response to his husband’s sudden melancholy. 

A single blue orb formed in his husband's palm and then Magnus touched it to the ground. What had once been a naturally glowing valley turned iridescent as it lit up with magic and power.

“Just like this place, the years will gather inside you, Alexander. As untouched and unchanged as this valley looks, even from hundreds of years ago, if you know where to look you can find the magical residue of the centuries that have passed. There are still scars and wounds and at times even loneliness. This place has witnessed war and birth and love and heartbreak, just like you will. As beautiful as it is, as  _ you _ are, it still has to bear witness to the horrors of the world and weather the continual upheaval of time.” 

“Magnus,” Alec said softly and he brought their joint hands to his lips and placed a soft kiss to his husband’s knuckles. “Forty years and I’ve never regretted joining you in immortality. Sometimes I’ll wonder what would be different, how things would have changed or if losing people would hurt less. But there’s no guarantee for any of it except that as an immortal I get to be  _ here. _ The most important part of my life will  _ always _ be to be by your side.”

It didn’t surprise him or fill him with insecurities as it once had, for Magnus to bring up what he sometimes considered as Alec’s sacrifice. Alec knew that even though Magnus was happy that they were immortal together, his husband also had deeply seeded insecurities. Fears and worries that he’d tentatively expressed at the beginning of their joint immortality and then hidden and brushed aside when Alec hadn’t changed his mind. 

Those thoughts hadn’t surfaced again until the first long fight they’d had  _ -a decade into Alec’s immortality-  _ and Alec had taken a few days after their argument to wander in his thoughts and to plan. It was what he did, in life and in his relationships. He made battle-plans for either an apology or possibly a counter argument, or both depending on the disagreement. Now, years later he couldn’t even remember the reason for their fight, just that of course he’d returned to Magnus and that it had been more quickly than his husband had apparently been expecting. 

Once again, after their reconciliation, Magnus had hidden his fears behind a bright smile, teasing kisses and an elaborate dinner. Yet a decade of loving each other and of trusting each other had betrayed him and Alec had known something was still wrong. From the way Magnus held him, stronger than usual, to the fact that his kisses were even more fervent and his control on his magic so frayed that they hadn’t left the loft for the two days his glamour had refused to come back. 

Finally, Magnus had admitted his worries and concerns. Things that he had thought might be too selfish to bring up when it was Alec who was leaving his mortality behind. Fears that he wouldn’t be enough, that decades down the road resentment and bitterness would grow, or that beyond that, Alec would grow disenchanted with immortality and their relationship. Things that Magnus didn’t quite believe but that bothered him nonetheless. The horrible and lingering fear that Alec might come to regret committing what could now be centuries to one person, after only a couple decades of life.

Understanding had warred with exasperation. They trusted each other but even trust couldn’t fix the fears and insecurities that rose in their minds and emotions. All of Alec’s love wasn’t enough to heal Magnus’ past hurts or future concerns and it had taken years for Alec to be okay with that. His own insecurities interfering with logic until enough time had passed and he understand that it wasn’t a personal failing, just a normal factor of being alive. 

After all, they were all valid concerns. 

Even though there were parts of Alec that had wanted to brush Magnus’ worries aside as absurd, he knew anything that caused Magnus’ forehead to crease with worry and his sleep to be unsettled was more than worth addressing. Every little fear that haunted his husband was worth defending against and alleviating. Just as Magnus had always been patient and encouraging through his troubles with him, Alec was the same in return. Consoling his husband and reminding him that they would work through whatever problems immortality brought, just as they had worked through all the other issues of their relationship. 

After all, they’d found their way through the centuries between their ages. Survived the wars that they’d both fought in, even when on opposite sides. They had overcome hatred and bigotry and withstood and worked through the turmoils of a new and complex relationship, one filled with sacrifices and enough love to withstand Edom.  Time was nothing compared to that but an opportunity. A chance to make more memories and overcome future trials and let their love grow even more. 

“Dance with me?” Alec asked and he pressed close to Magnus, grinning with soft, loving humor as he felt Magnus respond and place a hand to the small of his back.

“Well,” his husband said softly, a sniffle hidden behind his smile, “at least there’s one thing to be said for immorality.”

“Oh, and what’s that?”

“That after nearly half a century I’ve finally taught you how to dance outside of my dreams.” Magnus said and Alec’s outraged denial was cut off as Magnus twirled him in his arms and then dipped him low, laughter in his un-glamoured eyes and the sorrow that had followed them on their midnight adventure dispersing into the air. 

The snow beneath their feet never gave out, molding to their soles as they danced under the moon and stars. 

**Author's Note:**

> I have a LOT of anxiety. I am basically a cheetah who needs an emotional support k9 friend (actually I have both the human version of that and the actual k9 version).
> 
> I'm on tumblr as [alexanderlightweight](https://alexanderlightweight.tumblr.com)


End file.
